G u e s t E m i l y
The Power of Pretend: How to Encourage Imaginative Play at Home
If you’ve ever witnessed your child turn a spoon into a spaceship or a cushion into a
crocodile-infested moat, congratulations, you’ve experienced the magic of
imaginative play. It’s delightful, chaotic, and occasionally messy... but it’s also one
of the most important parts of your child’s development.
And the best part? You don’t need fancy toys or a Pinterest-worthy playroom. All
you need is curiosity, connection, and a little room for creativity (and, ideally, some
washable materials).
So, What Exactly Is Play?
As a clinical psychologist and the founder of
The Playful Psychologist, I work
closely with parents and educators to help reframe behaviour as communication,
and play as a pathway to connection. At its core, play is a child’s natural language,
a way of making sense of the world before they’ve got the words to explain it.
Psychologists define play as freely chosen, intrinsically motivated activity that’s led
by the child and done for its own sake. In other words, play isn’t just what fills time
between nap and dinner. It’s how children explore, learn, process emotions, and
even rehearse life’s big and little challenges.
And while there are many kinds of play (physical play, constructive play, sensory
play, you name it), imaginative play, also known as pretend play, symbolic play, or
dramatic play, is a particularly powerful vehicle for development.
What Does Imaginative Play Look Like?
Imaginative play is when your child transforms the everyday into the extraordinary.
Think:
- Turning a stick into a magic wand
- Playing “family” with a doll and a laundry basket
- Pretending to be a superhero, a veterinarian, or a talking banana (yes, that
one was personal)
Through imaginative play, children experiment with different roles, emotions, and
scenarios. They become the story-makers and rule-setters. It’s wonderfully
unstructured, deeply expressive, and, crucially, developmentally rich.
Why Imaginative Play Matters (A Lot More Than You Might Think)
As I often share with the families I support through
The Playful Psychologist,
imaginative play is one of the most powerful tools we have to support a child’s
emotional regulation and development, especially during the early years..
Let’s get nerdy for a moment, shall we?
Research has shown that imaginative play supports a wide range of developmental
areas:
1. Cognitive Growth
Pretend play strengthens problem-solving, planning, memory, and symbolic
thinking. When a child uses a block as a phone, they’re not just “playing…” they’re
building abstract thinking skills, which are critical for later academic learning
(maths, language, even reading comprehension).
2. Social & Emotional Development
When children role-play with others, they practice communication, empathy, and
perspective-taking. They learn to negotiate (“I’ll be the vet if you be the dog”) and
navigate feelings (“My dragon is sad because her wings are broken”).
These are big, lifelong skills, and they’re being learned in the sandbox or living
room.
3. Emotional Regulation
Ever seen a child “play out” something that’s been bothering them? Imaginative
play allows children to externalise big feelings: fear, frustration, even joy—and
process them in a safe and symbolic way.
It’s their version of therapy. Only with more pirate hats.
4. Language Development
Imaginative play is rich in narrative and vocabulary. Children create stories, describe
their characters, and expand their language in context, which is far more effective
than drilling flashcards or reciting colours.
In short, play is the
original early learning framework, and it’s evidence-based.
“But My Kid Just Bangs Pots Together…”
Totally normal!
The way children play evolves over time. Here's a rough guide to
what imaginative play can look like at different ages:
| Age |
What You Might See |
| 12–18 months | Simple pretend (feeding a doll, “talking” on a phone) |
| 2 years | Parallel pretend play; short sequences like pretending to cook and serve food |
| 3–4 years | Role-playing real-world scenarios like doctor, teacher, parent; longer storylines emerge |
| 5+ years | Collaborative play with peers, complex storylines, rule-based imaginary games |
And yes, banging pots together is still
play, it’s sensory, exploratory, and lays the
groundwork for imagination. Just because play doesn’t make sense to us as adults,
doesn’t mean that it is not play. Remember, there are truly no rules when it comes
to what defines play. It will look different for every child.
Encouraging Imaginative Play at Home (Without Losing Your Sanity)
So how can you gently foster more pretend play at home, without resorting to a toy
store haul or 450kg of glitter?
1. Choose Open-Ended Toys
Let’s be honest: most kids have one or two toys they loved for about 4 minutes
before they became glorified dust collectors. Often, these are close-ended toys,
ones that light up, play music, and do all the work for the child.
Open-ended toys, by contrast, are versatile and child-led.
Think:
- Wooden blocks
- Magnetic tiles
- Scarves or fabric pieces
- Cardboard boxes (honestly, the MVP of the toy cupboard)
- Other creative craft materials (helllooooo and thank you to the My Creative
Boxes that take the guess work out of what the buy and supply)
These toys don’t have a single “right” way to be used, which means they grow with
your child and their imagination.
2. Declutter the Toy Room
Less really is more. An overstimulating environment can actually inhibit creative
thinking. Try rotating toys, limiting choices, or setting up simple invitations to play
(e.g. a few animal figurines in a shoebox jungle). You might be surprised what your
child does when there’s less noise, literally and metaphorically.
In fact, I’ve written extensively about choosing toys that support cognitive and
emotional development, especially open-ended ones like magnetic tiles, blocks,
and sensory materials. You can find more detailed guidance in my
play resource.
3. Get Involved… Then Step Back
Children love it when we enter their world. So yes, sit down and be the dragon, the
shopkeeper, or the patient getting a check-up. But don’t feel pressure to lead the
play. Follow their lead, reflect what you see, and let them stay in charge.
That’s where the magic happens.
4. Bring Real Life Into Play
Kids love mirroring the adult world. Cooking, cleaning (well, sort of), looking after
babies, it’s all fascinating to them. Offer safe versions of real-life materials: a
whisk and bowl, a stethoscope, some envelopes and stamps. These simple props
can spark rich play narratives.
5. Make Space for Boredom
Boredom isn’t the enemy; it’s the birthplace of imagination.
It’s OK if your child isn’t “busy” every moment. Resist the urge to fill the silence. Trust me, that cardboard box will be a time machine in 10 minutes flat.
A Gentle Reminder for Parents (Yes, You)
Let’s be real for a moment, parenting in the early years can feel like a never-ending
to-do list. Between the washing pile that mysteriously regenerates overnight, the
snack negotiations, and trying to answer life’s big questions (“Why is the sky blue?”
at 6:03am), it’s easy to feel like you’re constantly doing and never quite being.
But here’s the truth: creating moments of connection and creativity with your child
doesn’t require a Pinterest-worthy craft cupboard or hours of prep time. You don’t
need to be a qualified art teacher to make play meaningful.
Imaginative play isn’t about perfection. It’s about presence.
The magic often happens in the mess, in the quiet, or in the cardboard box from
last week’s delivery. And that’s where My Creative Box comes in, they make play
purposeful but easy, so you can focus less on planning and more on participating.
That spoon? A microphone.
The couch? A jungle gym.
A few recycled containers? A rocket ship ready for take-off.
By providing simple, screen-free invitations to play, you’re giving your child exactly
what they need: space to explore, imagine, and express themselves.
Still Wondering Where to Start?
Here are a few quick prompts to help guide your toy and play choices:
1. Can this activity or toy be used in more than one way?
2. Will it grow with my child’s stage of development?
3. Does it encourage creativity, storytelling, or problem-solving?
4. Is it something we can explore together, not just observe from the sidelines?
5. Will it withstand a toddler tornado (at least for a few sessions)?
If you're nodding along, amazing. You're already creating a play space that
encourages imagination, independence, and joy.
As a psychologist, and a mum of three under five, I’ve seen the transformational
power of imaginative play. It builds cognitive flexibility, emotional resilience, and a
sense of wonder. Most importantly, it gives you and your child space to connect in
a way that feels real and joyful.
So next time your little one invites you into their make-believe world, whether it’s a
dragon lair, a cupcake shop, or a jungle safari, pause, smile, and step into the
story.
You’re not just playing. You’re growing something beautiful.
If you’re keen to explore more tools, strategies, and play-based resources to
support your child’s development, you’ll find a growing library of resources over at
The Playful Psychologist.
